Wednesday, August 01, 2007

We make the price, and everything nice

If you listen to English-language radio in Montreal, you have likely heard that ad for the Desjardins Ford car dealership. Their jingle, sung in English by French-accented singers, states: "We make the price... and everything nice. Des-jar-din Ford!"

The statement always seemed to me a poor translation of something in French. I might accept someone writing "we make the price lower through economies of scale." But on its own, "we make the price" is very odd.

The uninspired rhyme "and everything nice!" sounds like the work of someone at a car dealership who wanted to be home already and didn't feel the need to consider other rhyming options.

Desjardins Ford hasn't limited its abuse of the English language to radio ads. The Gazette recently published three ads from Desjardins Ford with a string of errors. This is the kind of thing that makes the Grammar Vandal angry. Me too.

Ad #1
Like the jingle slogan, the headline on the first ad ("Cause to excitement...") is obviously something poorly translated from French. I'm not crazy about the exclamation marks nor the fact there is a space before them (which, again, is a French thing thrust onto an English ad). Also need to add commas in the dollar amount and bring the dollar sign closer. And there is a typo ("heated lether seats").

Ad #2
Someone must have called the people at Desjardins Ford to help them with the headline. Because the second ad now states "Cause for excitement". Okay, that's better. But the exclamation marks are still there. And "lether" is still misspelled.

Ad #3
One step forward, nine steps back...

Yikes. The headline has changed to "The response to exictement..." Not only is there a typo, but the meaning is the opposite of what they intended. ("Hey, folks, feeling too excited today and need to relax? Drive a Ford! No excitement here!")

Same problem with the spacing before exclamation marks. The good news is they finally added an "a" to "lether." The bad news is they added it to the incorrect spot. Isn't "lethear" the character in Shakespeare who makes jet planes?

Desjardins Ford, please hire a copywriter to write and/or review your ads. I can help. Heck, I'll even make the price.

1 comment:

zura said...

Ugh! Sounds like you need to send them to The Anglicizer...